74.The Two Girls

Editing/Standardisation: Medicine Melancholy
Original Translation: Medicine Melancholy

Iris

“…Calmed down now?”

“Yes… I’m sorry, I… lost control of myself.”

I wiped my eyes, which must have turned completely red from crying.

Right now it’s just Reiji-san and I. The others, considerate enough to give me some space, had already gone on ahead.

“That’s good to hear… Just what happened back there? What did you see?”

“…”

Even though I thought I should tell him, I didn’t know what to say when I tried to, and the words just got stuck in my throat. My thoughts were all jumbled up, and I couldn’t think straight.

“I… I need some time to give it more thought. I’ll talk to everyone about it once I sort it all out.”

“Got it. Well, you’re in need of rest either way, the events of today must have taken a toll on you.”

“Thanks…”

Now that the “Wound” had disappeared, so did the headache that had been bothering me for a long time. There was no other sign of abnormality in the vicinity. My work here is done.

I should do as Reiji-san said and go to rest once I get back… I’m really tired. Both physically… and mentally.

When I returned to town, the former site of battle had been mostly cleaned up, and the townspeople who returned from their shelter were holding a feast. The town was filled with such enthusiasm and joy that it’s hard to believe that it got attacked this morning. Soon, it would resume its mining industry and life would go back to normal.

As for me… after exchanging greetings with everyone, I went straight to my lodging, as I didn’t want to get into trouble with any drunken troublemakers who might show up.

…I just want some rest already.

After cleaning myself with purification magic, I collapsed onto the bed.

I thought I wouldn’t be able to sleep because I had too much to think about, but sleep came much easier than expected. Before I knew it, I had pulled the covers over myself, and my consciousness sank to the bottom of a deep sleep…

Later that night

I woke up suddenly, suspicious of the pitch-black surroundings. When I checked the clock, it was still before sunrise.

I could no longer hear the hustle and bustle of the afternoon. It seemed that the victory feast had ended, and silence had descended upon the town.

Even after a deep sleep, I still didn’t feel much better mentally.

I remembered Lenny-san saying that she would leave the bath water ready. Maybe a bath would help me calm myself.

Lenny-san was probably resting in the room next to mine… In the end, I quietly left my room so as not to wake everyone up, and headed for the bath alone.

The bathing facilities in the former mayor’s mansion we took over as our base were divided into two. The larger bath for the servants was now open to the knights and used as the men’s bath. The other bath, built by the original owner for his own use, was used as the women’s.

Despite being the smaller one, it was still enough for several people to stretch their legs out, and a bathtub that’s a bit large for one person was installed.

It’s something clearly intended for multiple people to use, and based on the structure of the changing room, I didn’t want to know one bit about what it implies…

I took off my nightgown and underwear, folded them and put them into a basket, then…

“…Eh? Is someone already here?”

Someone else was already in the bath, as there was another basket with folded clothes in it… Did they wake up too early like me?

“Please excuse me…?”

As soon as I entered the bath, there was a loud splash, as if something had jumped into the water. But when I looked around, there was no one there… no, I saw something floating in the water… blond hair?

“Um… What are you doing?”

Fearfully cowering in the bathtub with her eyes and ears closed… was Titilia-san.

While remembering how Lenny-san did it, I washed my hair by mimicking her movement, then gave my body a quick wash before sinking into the bathtub.

To prevent my long hair from getting wet in the bath, I lightly squeezed it and tied it up with a hair clip I brought with me in advance.

The water had gone a little lukewarm, but it felt just right for simply relaxing and spacing out.

As I felt the heat of the warm water permeate my body, Titilia-san next to me slightly shook in fear… I didn’t understand why she’s so nervous.

“Um… P-Princess, you seemed to be in a lot of pain back there… Are you alright?”

“I had a good night’s sleep, and I’m feeling much better now. Thank you for your concern.”

She looked like she wanted to find a topic of conversation, so I smiled to reassure her.

“But I had promised you to tell my story on the way home. I apologize for not being able to do that.”

“No, I mean… your health is the most important! I’m just glad you’ve recovered… y-you scared me to death when you started screaming, you know?”

“W-Was it really that bad?”

It was at this moment that our eyes met.

She immediately snapped out of it and looked away from me. She sat in a seiza position in the bath, her knees pressed together with her hands, and stared at her hands in a frozen state.

“…? What’s the matter?”

“I-I’m sorry for asking but… Princess, I’ve been thinking about this for a while… y-your manners are so elegant, aren’t they?”

“Eh? Is that so…?”

“Y-Yes, even your current gestures, the way you turn your head, the little movements of your fingers, the way you tilt your head… Although you do it so calmly, I feel like you’re aware of every little detail… I don’t think I could never imitate that… Are you really someone from my old world? Or you’re actually a princess of this world from the beginning?”

“T-Thank you for your compliment…?”

I was a little embarrassed by the overly flattering words she said in a rush.

My girly mannerisms… I’d say the biggest contributing factor was seven continuous years of Ayame’s guidance. But that’s not all there is to it.

Seven years might seem like a long time, but I was already past my childhood when I started, so my learning ability was no longer the greatest.

If I didn’t have any existing foundation beforehand, no matter how much I practiced it, it’d ultimately be superficial, and flaws would soon show through.

So it’d be more correct to call my current mannerisms the result of all the things that had accumulated since my birth. Things like the environment in which I grew up, what I saw, and how I was disciplined.

But rather than simply a “girl”, Titilia-san was expecting me to behave like a “Princess”, so I needed to find a way to explain to her…

“My manners, they come from my mother’s influence actually.”

According to a story I heard from my grandfather a long time ago, the paternal side of my family traced its roots back to the ancient nobility, and my father definitely gave off such an aura… But my mother, as I remembered her, had even more refined manners than him.

As kind as she was, my mother had a strict side when it came to manners and behavior. Especially when I… when “Kuga Yanagi” had hair color and facial features that were not typical of Japanese people, I was often stared at with strange eyes. In order to give me the confidence to deflect such gazes, I was trained quite strictly from a young age.

Thanks to having my mother as a role model that I grew up watching and learning from, my foundation was able to build up over time… Ayame was able to easily handle the strict etiquette lessons from our grandparents, and I was able to master my current manners in just seven years, thanks to the advantage of the environment in which I was born and raised, which was given to me by my parents.

“Woah… Your mother, is she a princess?”

“I don’t think she’s Japanese, based on her hair color and facial features,  but she didn’t tell me anything more than that she came from far away… And now I can never see or talk to her again.”

“I’m sorry for your loss…”

“She died more than ten years ago, and I had more than enough time to come to terms with my feelings, so I’m not that bothered about it anymore.”

Even if the trauma from that incident still remained, it’s true that I’d moved on from the loss of my parents.

“By the way… why are you taking a bath at this hour? I can’t really say anything about other people, but…”

In addition, I noticed that her gaze had been wandering about since a while ago, so I couldn’t help but be curious.

I didn’t want to stress her with my question, but as soon as I asked, she lowered her head with a pale expression and fell silent.

“That’s… I…”

“Well, if you don’t want to say it, I won’t force you…”

“… I’ll say it. I’d be dishonest to you if I don’t. It’s just…”

She raised her face with an expression that looked like she had made a solemn decision.

“Even if you look at me with contempt, or even want to punish me, I’ll gladly accept it. But please, don’t tell Leonhardt-sama…!”

She tightly closed her eyes and bowed her head, trembling.

“I-I understand. I won’t tell anyone a thing, I promise.”

“Thank you… Actually, I’m…”

Titilia-san hesitated. I was starting to feel tense myself. However, she took a few deep breaths as if to shake off her hesitation, and she opened her mouth with determination.

“I’m actually a guy inside! I was a male player with a female avatar! I’m sorry for deceiving you!”

“……Ah.”

I was at a loss at what to say to this coming out.

“It feels wrong to take a women’s bath, and I’m too scared to take the men’s side… So I was planning to take a bath when there were no one else, but I didn’t expect you to come… I’m so sorry!”

Titilia-san bowed her head so vigorously, as if it was a slam, that the hot water violently splashed everywhere.

“I… I didn’t know you need some time alone. I should be sorry for intruding in your relaxation time.”

It seemed that I was giving her a hard time, so I had to apologize.

“……Eh? Is that it? You aren’t angry or disgusted at me or anything?”

“I was definitely surprised, but… it didn’t seem like you felt any shame being in the bath with me.”

“I do feel guilty about it… At first, I couldn’t even look at my own body, but now I don’t get that excited by girls anymore… On the contrary, when I caught sight of Milord’s muscles when I saw him exercising, my heart couldn’t stop beating…”

I see… It’d been over a month since she changed into her new body.

According to Nii-sama, emotions are affected by the substances that are exchanged in the brain and body. Since our body structure had changed drastically, so did the hormone balance. It is impossible for there to be no influence on our mental state.

For example, Nii-sama had become much more rough and rowdy than when he was Ayame in the old world… He didn’t seem to care about the little details anymore, and I referred to him as “Nii-sama” without any problem.

In other words, for us who have undergone a major change in gender, the longer it goes on, the more everything, literally from within our bodies to our minds, is changing… Titilia-san and I were going to become “girls” in every sense of the word.

“Then I wouldn’t mind sharing a bath with you. Please don’t worry, I know you meant no harm, so I won’t tell anyone.”

“…Are you forgiving me?”

“You were here this late because you felt guilty and wanted to be considerate of everyone, weren’t you? I think I can trust you… because I understand your feelings a little.”

I whispered the last part in a voice so quiet that it’s barely audible.

Yes, I understand that all too well. Even though I’ve gotten somewhat used to bathing with women, I still feel guilty. Milly-san and Philias-san’s fondness of skinship certainly didn’t help with that.

“You know… when you talked to me about the Count, you seemed like a genuine maiden… I could only think of you as a girl.”

“Y-Yes?”

“Not to mention you were so cute when you said, ‘my feelings for Leonhardt-sama are genuine’, that I can’t help but cheer for you.”

“Um…”

“And just now, the first thing you were worried about was that he would find out, wasn’t it? If that wasn’t genuine, I don’t know anything else… so do your best, okay? I’m rooting for you both!”

“…Princess, I didn’t expect you to be such a bully.”

Titilia-san pouted and made bubbles with her mouth, then submerged half of her flushed face in the water… I’m sorry if I teased you too much.

“By the way, did you create the avatar that was the basis for your body? It seems to be very well-made, but I hadn’t seen it in any avatar contest before.”

Avatars produced and sold by well-known companies were of high quality, but each company had their own unique pattern for making those.

As a champion, and eventually a judge after being banned from the contest, I had a general idea of them.

However, I don’t think she fits any of those patterns. So, I thought her avatar might be homemade like mine and Nii-sama’s…

“Yes, I made it myself. Originally, it was a request from my sister…”

I would like to play as a beautiful girl that’s completely different from my usual self in this long-awaited VR game… That was her sister’s request.

“Why did you end up using that avatar?”

“Well… Just after she ordered the VR hardware, her company sent her on a business trip. I still remembered her leaving in tears… Eventually, during the trip, she snapped and resigned from that company, made a husband over there and never came back.”

“That’s… rough.”

Her sister was truly something else…

“I was left alone with a brand new VR hardware, which my sister told me to use however I want. So I might as well use it, I thought…”

“That’s because ‘Worldgate Online’ never got an overseas release…”

There were quite a few requests for the service to be launched in other countries, actually. However, the main obstacle was the hardware required to launch the game, whose supply was significantly lower than the demand… so that idea went nowhere.

“I decided to use my sister’s hardware and avatar to play WGO. I had no problem with it because I was a streamer in real life and pretty familiar with using an avatar of a different gender. When I later found out that WGO only allowed avatar of the same gender as the person registered on the hardware, at the time, I thought it would be fun to play as a girl in this game too.”

She then told me her name as a streamer… which I immediately recognized. He had been around for a while, and frequently updated his avatar, all of which were highly perfected.

I see, the streaming community had been very tolerant of using avatars of different genders since its early days.

“I have lots of experience tinkering with 3D models… that’s why my sister requested me to make this ‘Titilia’. I worked on it for several months and was pretty proud of the end product. It would be a shame to let it go to waste because my sister couldn’t use it, don’t you think?”

She smiled wryly.

Of course it would! I’m totally with you, Titilia-san!

I clenched my fists tightly and nodded vigorously in agreement.

“Oh, you understand, right? I mean, of course you would, Princess… So, I was going to apply to the contest at first, but got scared and gave up. I didn’t think the people there would take it well if they found out that I was a guy.”

“Yeah…”

However, in the games we played in the old days before VR came out, understanding had progressed in our time, and unless it was something like cheating to gain profit, it was not really a concern for most people… but that wasn’t the case in WGO, where playing as a different gender would cause an uproar if it was found out.

That’s why when it was still a game, I tried my best to act polite and not to attract hate, but before I knew it, I was completely mistaken for a female player.

Honestly, I wished I could have said publicly that I’m male inside, but I couldn’t.

I didn’t mean for it to happen this way, Titilia-san said, sighing helplessly.

In my case… or rather “Yanagi’s”, Ayame was the one who initiated the account swap in the first place, so even if something were to happen, we could simply swap back, so we didn’t really see it as a problem… But in Titilia-san’s case, her sister had gone abroad, so it wasn’t going to be possible.

“… And that’s it. I’m really grateful that you not only forgive me, but also acknowledge me as the same sex. Thank you so much, Princess.”

“I’m glad I could help.”

I said that, but something rubbed me the wrong way.

Could I truly say that I empathized with her situation?

Unlike her, my mind felt as if it had been female from the start, I couldn’t even think of the time in the game as “crossplaying” anymore.

That’s why… I couldn’t truly… share her suffer……ing?

“…Ah… Huh?”

“What’s the matter, Princess?”

“I-It’s nothing.”

What… did I think just now?

“………………?!”

I hurriedly dove into the bathtub.

I’d been perfectly calm the entire time, despite sharing a bath with Titilia-san, who wasn’t wearing a single thread of clothing… and although I was excited to see something beautiful, I was strangely nonchalant about it. Because we were the same sex.

I used to be hesitant to go into the women’s bath with Lenny-san and Philias-san, but I quickly got used to it… because we were the same sex.

What if, yeah, just a what-if, Reiji-san was in the bath with me instead?

I simulated that scenario in my head…

No, that’s not happening! There’s no way I can bath together with a man… the opposite sex as me!!

I was completely fine until a while ago… No, since when did I become “fine” in this situation?

I realized. I had been trying not to think about it until now, but now I realize it clearly… I had fully identified myself as a girl. Now that I’d realized it, I couldn’t remember much of what it felt to be a man.

Yeah, I’m a girl.

And if I hadn’t realized it, I could have ignored it and looked away. Much as Titilia-san quickly fell in love with Leonhardt-sama, if the current me were to fall in love with someone, it’d probably be a man like R…

“…HJGJKILIHSJJSHFJHKLJFS?!”

“Why are you freaking out all of a sudden?! Princess?! PRINCESS?!”

When I came to, Titilia-san had already taken me out of the bath and helped me put on some clothes.

“…Calmed down?”

“I lost control of myself again… Sorry for scaring you…”

Nothing happened in the bath. Absolutely nothing, yes.

Let’s bury the thoughts that I had just now deep in my heart and lock them away. And just like that, I was back to my normal self…

“So you’re here, Iris. Lenny-san couldn’t find you anywhere, so she got pretty worried-”

“HYAAAAAH?!”

My entire body jumped in horror at the familiar voice that came from behind… so much for “calming down”.

It’s just Reiji-san. But for some reason, I instinctively used Titilia-san as a shield and hid behind her back.

I was embarrassed when he saw my flushed red face and body.

I was embarrassed to be seen wearing just underwear and a thin nightgown.

I was embarrassed to show my bare skin.

My heart was beating like crazy… I’m going to lose my mind if this goes on any longer…!